Category: Trials

Faith, Trials, Uncategorized

It’s Not Easy

meghanewhite

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Wouldn’t it be so nice if life were easy peasy? Smooth sailing. No valleys, only mountain tops. No trouble, only good times. No sadness, no heartache, no trials, no pain of any kind. Wait a minute, I just described heaven. Life is not easy. It’s not meant to be. There are days when I want it to be easy. Then God gently reminds me that this is not my home. And yes, it’s hard on this side of eternity.

I’m tired this week. Processing my mom’s death and trying to get back to “normal” (whatever that is) has been challenging. I hit a breaking point the other day. I woke up overwhelmed. Exhausted emotionally, and spiritually. I had to step away from everything. Take a breather, and ask God to start me over again.

The great thing about coming to the end of ourselves is God meeting us in our weakness. We don’t like it. I know I don’t. I want to always feel strong, always feel full of faith. When everything slips out of my grasp, the Lord is there waiting to catch me. He gives me the rest I need. He listens to me as I pour out my heart to Him. He never loses patience with me, or shakes His head in disappointment.

My weakness draws me to my Savior. I am reminded again how much I need Him. I really can do nothing apart from Jesus.

“I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. (john 15:5, NIV)

He is the vine, I am just the branch. And if I’m in the pruning phase, then I need rest. This little branch is tired, but still here.

It’s not easy, but God is always good. He never changes.

“For I the Lord do not change.” (Malachi 3:6a, ESV)

“Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.” (Hebrews 13:8, ESV)

My goal as a Christian, is to daily surrender all to Him. To take up my cross. (Luke 9:23) Most days I’m pretty bad at surrendering. I’ll get there, one day. Probably my last day on earth. Hahaha! I’m so glad God is running things, and not me.

If you’re having a not easy time lately, like me, be encouraged. As difficult as life can be, we are right where we are supposed to be. So much good can come come out of the hard times, if we allow God to work in our lives.

God is on our side, and working ALL things out for our good.

“We know that all things work together for the good of those who love God: those who are called according to His purpose.” (Romans 8:28, HCSB)

The world tells us to be strong. Be independent. Just do it, yourself. The Bible paints a different picture. Weakness in ourselves, means strength in Christ.

“That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” (2 Corinthians 12:10, NIV)

There’s no place I’d rather be, then strong in Christ. It takes my weakness to get there. So, I accept my limits. I accept my weakness. I accept that it’s not easy. And I gladly surrender myself to Christ. With Jesus, I’m strong.

Love you all,

Meghan

 

P.S.

If you need prayer please go to my contact page. I would love to pray for you!

friends, grief, Trials, Uncategorized

Thank God for Good Friends

meghanewhite

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These beautiful chocolate bars were waiting for me as I stumbled into the guest room at my friend’s house the other night. Exhausted, and a bit overwhelmed at the thought of facing Mom’s memorial and all that involved, some sweetness to console me.

Moonstruck Chocolate is my favorite chocolate. It’s based in Oregon and I had completely forgot about it, until Tuesday night. My amazing friend Carol remembered my love of Moonstruck and she blessed me. Coming to her house is a respite in the storm.

When I walked in the guest room in a bit of a daze, and saw a bag of goodies and those two bars sticking out of the top, my heart was full. Only a dear friend would do something that thoughtful.

Thank God for good friends who love, support, and care for you in difficult times. A true friend in life is a blessing. A true friend stands by you in all the ups and downs. A true friend is the one you can call in the middle of the night when everything is falling apart and lend a listening ear. And, a true friend is the one you can laugh with and cry with.

Carol is just this type of friend. The Lord brought us together many years ago and the friendship was instant. We have stood by each other through thick and thin.

I have several other rock solid friends that I will share about another time. God has blessed me beyond measure with good people in my life who love me and take care of me. I try and do the same for them as well.

To have good friends you need to be a good friend. I hope I can give back in some small way the love and care that has been given to me.

During this not easy time of saying goodbye to my mom and preparing for her memorial, I am blessed.

Thank you Lord for good friends!

Love you all,

Meghan

Faith, grief, Trials, Uncategorized

Life’s Interruptions

meghanewhite

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He stilled the storm to a whisper;
    the waves of the sea were hushed. 

Psalm 107:29

 

My life was recently interrupted with my mom’s death. We knew it was coming, as cancer was spreading through her body. It still takes your breath away, because you’re never ready. So here I am planning a memorial, and grieving. My life has paused, for now. Pictures are being sorted. Details for Mom’s memorial being planned. Flights booked. Everything right now is about honoring my mom.

I would choose smooth, calm waters. Everything perfectly planned. No interruptions. No death. No disease. No accidents. No real problems. It doesn’t work that way on this side of eternity. This world is broken. We are all passing through. Interruptions will come. They will bring us to our knees. They will bring us to the Father. They can make us stronger in Him, if we choose.

My weakness and God’s strength meet. At that exact point, I am strong.

So today, I surrender. I wouldn’t choose to plan a memorial for my mom right now. I’d put it off. It’s too much. Too hard. Too painful. Yet, I am forced to deal with this. I make the choice to stand on The Rock, Jesus. As I stand, He holds me. Guides me. Makes a way.

Most of life’s interruptions are unexpected. We are stunned in these moments. Sad, overwhelmed, fearful, and lost. There is good news. God is never surprised by anything. God is never overwhelmed. God is never afraid. God knows each painful thing we have to face. God will give us the grace to carry on. He sustains. He is faithful. He knows what good can come out of these interruptions.

I choose to trust God. I can’t see past these waves, but God can. He’s holding me, and He promises to get me through. God never goes back on His Word. God is constant, faithful, loving, and true.

What life interruption are you facing today? Maybe you think there is no way you are going to make it. That is a lie. You are going to make it.

God is a way maker.

God can still storms.

God can give you peace.

God loves you!

Hold on to Him. Trust Him. Obey Him. Praise Him.

 

Love you all,

Meghan

 

P.S. If you need prayer, please leave your request in the comments or on my contact page.

 

Photo Credit: EliasSch from Pixabay

 

Faith, grief, Trials, Uncategorized

I Hate Goodbyes

meghanewhite

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The last day of 2019 was Mom’s last day on Earth. Even though we knew it was coming, it still really hurts. No matter what, you’re just not ready to say goodbye. I wasn’t, that’s for sure. Selfishly, I wanted more time. Come on Lord, give her a few more years. Then I don’t have to deal with that pain quite yet. Yet, here I am grieving. Not ready for it. Who is ever prepared to grieve?

I have peace. That’s the funny part. I have complete peace of where my mom is, heaven. Mom loved Jesus and knew Him as her Savior and Lord. She is not suffering anymore. That makes me so happy! Mom spent most of her life sick. She is now free of all pain and suffering. She wasn’t big on complaining, so most people would never know just how much illness and disease she dealt with. And, she always looked incredible, not like a sick person.

If I had my way, we would skip off to eternity together, holding hands. Young and old. No one would leave this earth until we all went home to Jesus, together. That’s not how it works. We were made for heaven. This is just the temporary part. We can easily lose sight of that and think that this life is it. When our loved ones die, it is a reminder that there’s more. We miss them, long to be where they are.

But our citizenship is in heaven. And we eagerly await a Savior from there, the Lord Jesus Christ. Philippians 3:20 

It’s bittersweet. Mom is gone, and I will always miss her terribly. But, she is rejoicing with Jesus, with a new disease free body. No pain. No sorrow. No sin. No evil. And Jesus is there, waiting for all of us who said yes to Him.

My Father’s house has many rooms; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you? John 14:2

So Mom, I love you and miss you, but I’m happy for you. The life you lived was filled with many struggles, but many triumphs as well. The glass was half full to you. There was always a fight in you. Resilience was your middle name. God knew you needed that quality, and it served you well. I hope I picked up a tiny bit of that fighting spirit.

When Mom was down to her final moments I asked her husband to hold the phone to her ear. I felt so strongly I needed to say goodbye. I can’t explain it, just a strong feeling that I needed to do this. I love you. I pray for peace. Goodbye Mom. She didn’t respond. No movement. Her eyes were shut. I believe she heard me. Minutes later she passed away.

We are now preparing for Mom’s memorial. Though difficult, it’s a blessing too. So many loved my mom. She touched many lives in her 76 years. Well done Mom. You did it. Now dance with Jesus.

I won’t say goodbye. See you soon Mom! I love you.

 

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The beginning for Mom and me. She was pregnant with me in this picture.

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This picture was taken at least 25 years ago and how I see her. Healthy and beautiful.

Dorothea Louise 

October 19, 1943 ~ December 31, 2019

Love you Mom ❤

Faith, Trials, Uncategorized

Count Your Blessings

meghanewhite

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Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.

James 1:17

 

We all have Christmas traditions. One of ours is to play the movie White Christmas while the tree is being decorated. I love all the music from that classic movie. Of course the iconic “White Christmas” song by Irving Berlin is one of the most beloved Christmas songs of all time. And I do love that song. But there’s another song from the movie that I love. “Count Your Blessings” was also written by Irving Berlin. He wrote it during a time he was suffering from insomnia brought on by stress. A doctor suggested to count his blessings instead. Good advice.

When I’m worried and I can’t sleep
I count my blessings instead of sheep and I fall asleep counting my blessings
when my bankroll is getting small I think of when I had none at all
and I fall asleep counting my blessings.

 

I think about a nursery,
and I picture curly heads,
and one by one I count them
as they slumber in their beds.

If you’re worried and you cant sleep,
just count your blessings instead of sheep
and you’ll fall asleep counting your blessings.

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Worry and stress are exasperated during this “Most Wonderful Time of The Year”. While it should be one of the happiest times, for many it can be one of the hardest. I think of this song often throughout the year when I feel stressed. When I stop and count all of my many blessings it gives me perspective. The problems will always come, but the gifts from our Heavenly Father will come too. So let’s thank Him for all He has given us, for all He has done and continues to do.
The Word of God is clear about what we are to do with our worry. Give it all over to Jesus. Here are just a few verses:
Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. 1 Peter 5:7 (NIV)
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Phillipians 4:6-7 (NIV) 
When I am afraid, I put my trust in you. Psalm 56:3 (NIV)
No matter what you are facing today, stop and take a few moments to thank God for everything He has blessed you with. Write these blessings down and look at them daily to remember how faithful God is. Let’s count our blessings! Our lists should be so long that we run out of paper. If you are in a painful place, at least write a few blessings down. There is always something to be thankful for. Your list will grow as you begin to think about all the good God has done.
Here is a big blessing to start you off. Jesus came into this world as a tiny baby to save us. Thank you Jesus for the blessing and miracle of Christmas.
When we thank God for His many blessings something happens. We stop focusing on the problems and stress and start focusing on God. That changes our mood and our attitude. Our faith grows, and our praise gets stronger. That’s powerful!
May your load be a little lighter today. May God give you fresh joy and perspective when you think on all He has done.
Love you all,
Meghan
P.S. If you need prayer leave your request in the comments or on my contact page.
Images by monicore from Pixabay