Marriage – Meghan E White

30 Years

September 30, 2025 meghanewhite

Three decades of life together. Where does the time go? It flies faster than I can ever catch it, and hold it, and try desperately to stop it. I wouldn’t change any of it. The beautiful moments, exhausting struggles, the victories, the defeats, the mundane. All of it has made this lovely tapestry of thirty years together.

Have you ever looked at the back of a tapestry? It’s a mess of strings sticking out with no clear picture of what the artist is creating. You can’t tell for sure what exactly is going on just by looking at the back of a tapestry. But serious work is being done in the back, the part no one will ever see. Needle and thread poke through back and forth making a giant mess. Flip it over to the front and it all begins to make sense as a magnificent work takes shape.

It’s like marriage. There are messy painful parts. There are trials, tribulations, and trouble. There are also joyous times filled with fun, laughter, and sheer happiness. There are ups, downs, and sideways threads that come through that tapestry and sometimes you can’t see it. You don’t see the big picture. But oh wow, when the artist lets you take a peek at the work in progress a stunning design is revealed.

God brought Tom and I together in the covenant of marriage. He wove together our strengths and weaknesses to make a unique tapestry. It’s our story that God uses to make this beautiful piece of art. It’s our life together covered by God’s grace. He is still writing our story as he weaves more colors into our tapestry. Sure it can get messy, but the Master Artist is creating a masterpiece.

Happy 30th Anniversary, Tom! I love you with all my heart.

And I love all of you.

Meghan

Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate. Mark 10:9

Marriage

29 Years

September 30, 2024 meghanewhite

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The mighty Mississippi River snakes through Vicksburg, Mississippi. Side note: close your eyes and spell Mississippi out loud. Try M-i-crooked letter-crooked letter-i-crooked letter-crooked letter-i-humpback-humpback-i. Does anyone else remember that from childhood?

Back to my story. In 2021, we went to Vicksburg, Mississippi to see the historic Civil War battle field. My husband is a huge Civil War buff so Vicksburg was on the bucket list. It’s an incredible place. I highly recommend it if you love history. I’m sharing this picture with the pretty view from Vicksburg National Military Park, as an ode to my husband, Tom.

September 30th, is our twenty-ninth wedding anniversary. We are one year away from three decades of marriage, which is incredible. As momentous as this milestone is, we won’t be celebrating with a fancy dinner out, or a trip to some fun destination. Tom has been in the hospital since Tuesday of last week. Kidney failure struck again, but this time the blow was the worst ever.

This is Tom’s third hospitalization in three and a half years. Dialysis started this week and it’s not something we ever wanted, who does. Tom is supposed to come home on our anniversary, which would be the best gift. No jewelry or expensive gifts for me, not that I am into any of that. Those are the stereotypical anniversary presents. All I want is my husband healthy, and I’m praying for it.

After decades of marriage, I can look back on the good and bad times, and always see God’s faithful hand in our lives. Right now is an extremely difficult time, and also an opportunity for us to once again see God’s hand healing, providing, and caring for us. I would never choose this for my husband but what my Heavenly Father is allowing is for our good and His glory. We trust Him.

Months ago I was in the kitchen slicing potatoes as I prepared dinner. I cut my finger and without hesitation Tom got up from the family room, grabbed the knife, and finished slicing the potatoes as I got a bandage. He was exhausted after working all night. But that’s what you do for the one you love. That’s what my husband does for me. That’s what we do for each other. We don’t have to discuss it, we just jump in and help each other in our time of need. That is real love.

I’m helping Tom right now with the strength that the Lord provides. We stick together, and stick up for one another. When the two became one, we feel each other’s pain, and help each other. Tom has helped me and lifted me up countless times. It’s my turn. Thank you God, for twenty-nine years of a wonderful marriage, not perfect, but blessed.

Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. Genesis 2:24, NKJV

Love you all,

Meghan

Photo credit: Meghan E. White

Just for fun and a few laughs, a quote from The Princess Bride, one of Tom’s favorite movies. If you’ve never seen it you won’t get it. The rest of us get it.

The Impressive Clergyman:

“Mawage. Mawage is wot bwings us together today. Mawage, that blessed awangement, that dweam wifin a dweam. And wuv, tru wuv, will fowow you foweva. So tweasure your wuv.”

Marriage

27 Years Ago

September 30, 2022September 30, 2022 meghanewhite

These two were in love and having a great time on their honeymoon in San Francisco. After twenty-seven years, these two are still in love. We may be a bit older, with a few more wrinkles, but hey, we’re still here by the grace of God.

San Francisco was not our first choice for a honeymoon destination. We wanted to go to Paris. We were researching going to France, from books. Remember books? Ha ha ha!! This was the early days of the world wide web. My dad offered to send us to France if we exchanged a big fancy wedding for a much simpler one. That was incredibly generous of my dad. Thank you Dad!

The decision ultimately came down to me. I was a very young, soon-to-be bride, who wanted my dream wedding. So I chose the beautiful, fancy wedding over the fantasy honeymoon. I don’t regret my wedding at all. I do regret not choosing Paris. I would like to tell twenty-two year old me, “Go to Paris, you dummy!”. My choice was made, and we had a fantastic honeymoon. Lots of great food and fun in an amazing city.

We have nothing exciting planned to celebrate our anniversary today. Tom is working 12 hour night shifts right now, and he works tonight and all weekend. But that’s life. And sometimes, that’s married life. You go through challenges and challenging times. You have mountaintop experiences where you are high-fiving each other because you made it with the Lord’s help. And when you are in the valley together, you hug each other, and hold on to one another, and trust God to make a way. And He does make a way, every time.

So today I celebrate my husband, Tom. He’s a good, Godly man, who leads our family, and works tirelessly to provide for us. I also celebrate the wonderful gift of marriage. God made marriage and it is good. Thank you Lord for carrying us all these years. It is by Your amazing grace that we are here today. You get all the glory, all the honor, and all the praise!

A little side note. I keep every card Tom has given me over the years because the words mean so much. He has always chosen the most gorgeous cards and I cherish them. I am a card hoarder. I feel better now that I confessed. Here is one of the anniversary cards he gave me, several years ago. It’s so pretty!

And though one may be overpowered, two can resist. Moreover, a cord of three strands is not quickly broken. Ecclesiastes 4:12

Thanks for coming along with me today!

Love you all,

Meghan

Marriage

26 Years and Counting

September 30, 2021 meghanewhite

Twenty-six years sure flies by fast. So many memories. So many adventures, trials, heartaches, joys, and triumphs. The part of the wedding vows where it says “in sickness and in health” is no joke. We were put to the test this past six months with Tom’s health. An emergency hospitalization involving kidney failure, blood transfusions, and far too many questions forced us to rely on our faith in God and each other.

Did we pass the test? Only God knows for sure. I can say in all honesty that God carried us through the trial. There were many downs, and some ups too, during months of tests, and surgeries and a whole lot of physical pain. We are still here by the grace of God. We still love each other. We still believe that with God all things really are possible.

Marriage is a journey. But you journey together. And if you add Jesus to the mix, you have a recipe for success. Not easy, but solid. Because Jesus Christ is the solid Rock. He is the foundation for our marriage. We are not perfect, we are normal people. It’s all Jesus. He gets the glory.

Happy anniversary to us. It hasn’t been all romance these many months. It’s been taking it one day at a time. One doctor’s appointment at a time. Being grateful for good health care, and excellent doctors. Being grateful for the amazing gift of life. Being grateful for today.

Here’s to twenty-six wonderful years with my sweet husband Tom. You have endured so much. What an incredible example you have been to our sons of perseverance, faith, endurance, and strength. You are my hero.

Love,

Meghan

Marriage

25 Years

September 25, 2020September 25, 2020 meghanewhite

On a fall day twenty-seven years ago my life forever changed. I was a brand new employee at an insurance company. My boss was showing me around and brought me to my cubicle. Right next to my desk was an empty cubicle with a nameplate Tom White. I only saw the name and the Holy Spirit spoke clearly to my head and my heart, “You are going to marry Tom White.”

There is no way that is happening. I don’t know who this Tom is, but I am not going to marry him. There is no way my future husband is right here at my new job. Nope. Not happening. End of story.

Twenty-five years of marriage later, obviously I was wrong. God knew exactly what He was doing when He brought Tom and I together. I have no idea how twenty-five years has flown by, but it has. The days are long but the years are short.

When you’re a newlywed the world is your oyster. All things seem possible. We bought our first home, a fixer upper, and spent countless hours scraping layers of wallpaper, and ripping up shag carpet. But it was ours, and we were together, and we were happy. We got a dog and a cat before we had kids, to practice on. We shared our hopes about the future, and dreamed dreams together.

Once the first baby arrived, time seemed to accelerate. When the second baby arrived, we were in the fast lane of life. As I look back on these past twenty-five years it makes me happy. There are so many precious memories and painful ones too. The thread through our entire marriage is Jesus. It’s a scarlet string that is woven throughout our good and bad times. He has sustained us and He will continue to do so.

A lot happens over a quarter of a century in a marriage.

There has been so much laughter.

There have been some tears too.

We have had stupid petty arguments.

We have had some ugly arguments too.

We have apologized to each other.

We have put each other above our own needs.

There have been a million and one hugs and twice as many kisses.

We’ve had fun adventures.

We’ve had mountain top experiences.

The dessert years were the hardest.

Don’t get me started on the valleys.

We held on tight to Jesus and each other during the storms.

We know what real unconditional love looks like.

We’ve grieved and mourned over lost loved ones.

We have cooked countless meals.

Planned hundreds of parties.

Took dozens of camping trips.

Went on dozens of road trips.

Had some fantastic vacations.

Bought and sold several homes.

Fixed up a couple of those homes.

Had dogs and cats over the years.

Painted more rooms than I can count.

Disciplined little ones and big ones too.

Changed one million diapers.

Moved across the country on our own.

Made major career changes.

Suffered job loss.

Dealt with serious health issues in our children.

Prayed, and prayed, and prayed together.

Served at churches and ministries.

Worshiped God together.

Forgiven each other.

Given grace and mercy to each other.

Watched countless movies and cooking shows.

Planned gardens and remodels.

We still have so many dreams and hopes.

Jesus has carried us all the way through these twenty-five incredible years. I don’t have some magic formula of how to stay married and stay happily married. (Read my other posts below, where I go into more detail.) All I know is, God made marriage and it is good. We need God at the center of our marriage to succeed. I have learned a lot over these years. There have been some very hard lessons and God used my husband to teach me. Sometimes God has used me to teach Tom.

Thank you Father God for these blessed twenty-five years. I do not take them for granted. Each day with Tom has been a treasure. He is the best man I know. God gave us to each other and we need to take care of this precious gift. We try our best, but fall short at times. It is God’s grace that has brought us this far. That beautiful scarlet thread of Jesus is woven through our twenty-five year history. That thread does not end. It is eternal and will carry us through until we go home, to heaven.

Happy 25th Anniversary Tom! I love you so much. Here’s to another 25 by the grace of God.

Love you all,

Meghan

Check out my other posts on marriage.

Marriage Is A Blessing

24 Years