Parenting – Meghan E White

My Nest Has a Vacancy

August 23, 2024 meghanewhite

In the spring while trimming one of our wax myrtles I discovered this beautiful bird’s nest. There were no eggs, and not a bird to be found. This humble home was built with care and then abandon. This bird even used plastic, as well as twigs and grass, now that’s resourceful. The things we do for our offspring.

We do so much to prepare our nests for the arrival of our sweet little ones. Getting a crib or bassinet, buying diapers, clothes and toys, all in anticipation of a precious new baby. We clean the nest, maybe even build a new one, all in preparing for the blessed addition to our families.

It’s difficult to prepare for the time when the little baby bird grows up and leaves the nest. Instead of baby clothes, it’s stuff for their dorm room or apartment, or wherever they are going. Except this time it’s not for the nest, it’s for their new lives. The nest is not needed in the same way anymore.

I don’t know if you ever feel completely ready, as a parent, for your child to leave the nest. Maybe for some, they are ready to kick their teenage birds out, not me. But, it’s definitely time to spread those wings and fly.

We moved my youngest son into his dorm room at college this week. He was ready. I was sort of ready, but sort of not. I kept thinking of all the things I didn’t tell him, or teach him. What about this? What about that? Oh, I forgot to tell him …… fill in the blank. It’s letting go, and it’s not easy, at least for me.

I’ve done this before, but it’s different with the youngest. This is the last time to send a kid to college. It’s very exciting, and I am so happy for Joshua, and all the experiences and opportunities that wait for him. However, my mind starts to worry, which is not good. It’s my default, and the Lord has patiently taught me over the years how not to worry, and trust Him.

I’m singing a new song, “Let It Go!”. But my version is, “Let him go, let him go, into the Lord’s perfect care,” or something like that. I know that my Heavenly Father has my son in the palms of His very capable hands. I have peace, and I am truly happy for him. My old habits want to come back, but this time I’m saying, “No!” to worry and fear. I’m saying, “Yes!” to the Lord and His purpose and plan.

Fly little bird. Spread those gorgeous wings and see what you can do.

But those who wait upon the LORD will renew their strength; they will mount up with wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not faint. Isaiah 40:31

Love you all,

Meghan

Parenting

The End of My Homeschooling Era

May 24, 2024 meghanewhite

It all began in 2004, with my oldest son, Dylan. I vividly remember letting him wear his pajamas those first days of homeschool. I had no clue what I was doing, but knew this is what I was supposed to do. I purchased curriculum and our journey began. I was working for a staging and set design company at the same time I started homeschooling. Thankfully, I worked for myself and could set my own hours. My in-laws watched Dylan on my work days. It was kind of crazy to juggle both at first, but kindergarten is a bit more low key than say, high school. So, it was doable.

Dylan and I were learning together. He was learning reading, writing, and arithmetic. I was learning his strengths and weaknesses (and mine), and where to encourage him, and where to give him breaks and fun. We’d have recess at home, and play classic games like red light, green light. We joined our first homeschool co-op where Dylan started taking some classes, and going on field trips, and making new friends.

Halfway through kindergarten I got pregnant with Joshua. Morning sickness was my BFF all day long for months. Homeschool and work continued. The juggling act got a bit more complicated, but I pressed on like so many other moms. Before long I was hauling a new born to classes and homeschool events for Dylan. I’m an amateur in the homeschool world with only two children. There are some very large homeschool families with eight to ten kids and more. My hats off to those amazing moms.

We had a few years with no homeschool as Dylan went to a public charter school for third through sixth grade. The timing was perfect and the school was nice and small. I still had Josh with me while Dylan was in school. Then Dylan came back home for school in the seventh grade and Josh went to the same public charter school for kindergarten and first grade. I always had a child at home with me over the past twenty year homeschool journey.

Fast forward to today. Joshua just graduated from high school. And yes, he was homeschooled. There are graduations for homeschool kids. Joshua was part of a little school where he took classes and that’s where he had his ceremony. Here I sit. The dust is settling after our homeschool experience that started two decades ago. The remaining curriculum is either being sold or donated. Joshua starts college in August and this mama is done.

As I look back on my homeschooling years I am grateful. It was a blessing being able to be home with my children. We sacrificed to make that a priority. It is the grace of God that carried us through. There were hard days when I said “I can’t do it, Lord. It’s too hard.” It was very difficult for Joshua to go from traditional school to homeschool. He looked at me like I was crazy, and maybe I was. The crazy choice to homeschool gave us the chance to set our own schedule, and do things like take the boys on an annual camping trip right when school started for public school kids.

We homeschooled because we knew this is what God wanted us to do. This is what kept me going on the hard days. But there were so many good days, and good times that made it all worth it. The family dynamic changed. We grew closer because we had to rely on each other. And yes, my husband Tom helped too. I could not have gotten through math and science without him. It was all of us working together. We met so many awesome families along the way. And we had so many fantastic experiences with co-ops, classes, sports, music lessons, and everything in between that contributed to my boys learning.

I am not an expert on homeschool. I don’t think I was that good at it, but I see the fruit in my kids. There are some super star homeschool moms out there, that was not me. Although, when Joshua was in elementary school, he would say, “Mom, you’re the best teacher,” which is so sweet and not true. I pray that my obedience to the Lord will continue to bless my kids. We have so many good memories.

It’s time to close the books on this chapter of my life. I loved it all. What a wonderful adventure our family experienced. Thank you, Lord! It’s all Him. I’m ready for the next chapter, the next adventure. I don’t know what that is yet, but He’ll show me.

To everything there is a season, and a time for every purpose under heaven. Ecclesiastes 3:1

Love you all,

Meghan

photo credit: Meghan E. White

Parenting

Motherhood

May 10, 2024May 10, 2024 meghanewhite

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Young Mother Sewing, oil on canvas c. 1890, Mary Cassatt

Multitasking is a mother’s middle name. Mom’s have to do it all, at once. God has uniquely gifted mothers to juggle, though we don’t always do it well. Sometimes those spinning plates come crashing down, and we clean up the mess, like any good mother.

Mom’s do so many things, and wear so many hats, sometimes piled one on top of the other. Mom’s love fiercely. We love our children so much that we make the costume, and we bake the birthday cake, and we buy the poster board for the school project without complaint. For the satisfaction is knowing that our kids have a smile, and that’s enough.

Mom’s remind those precious children how wonderful they are when they forget. Mom’s protect, comfort, and sit up with sick children in the middle of the night. Mom’s pray, and pray for our kids, because no one else will pray for them like we do.

Here’s to all the mamas out there. You are important in your child’s life. Thank you for loving them, no matter how big or small they are.

She is clothed with strength and dignity;
she can laugh at the days to come.
She speaks with wisdom,
and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
Proverbs 31:25-26

“THERE IS NO INFLUENCE so powerful as that of the mother.” Sarah Josephina Hale, American pioneer and writer

“What do girls do who haven’t any mothers to help them through their troubles?” Louisa May Alcott, writer and editor

“Our children are not going to be just “our children” – they are going to be other people’s husbands and wives and the parents of our grandchildren.” Mary S. Calderone, physician and writer

“There is so much to teach, and the time goes so fast.” Erma Bomback, humorist

“There is nothing more thrilling in this world, I think, than having a child that is yours, and yet is mysteriously a stranger.” Agatha Christie, writer

“To love the tender heart ever fled,
As on its mother’s breast the infant throws
Its sobbing face, and there in sleep forgets its woe.” Mary Tighe, Irish poet

My mom with her mom, 1958.

Me and my boys, 2020.

Happy Mother’s Day!

Love you all,

Meghan

Family, Parenting

Happy Father’s Day

June 18, 2021 meghanewhite

Tiny newborn Dylan wrapped his little baby hand tightly around his dad’s finger. Only days old and the love of a father for his child was immediate. Not a lot changed over the years except the chubby baby hand grew, and so did the love.

Dylan would follow Tom everywhere, and wanted to do anything his dad was doing. If Tom was in the garage and using tools, Dylan wanted to use tools too. Tom would hand Dylan pliers or wrenches and let him play along. When Tom mowed the lawn, Dylan mowed right next to him with his toy lawn mower.

At two-years old Dylan loved wooden trains, especially Thomas the Tank Engine. There was always wooden track set up on his bedroom floor. Dylan would wait patiently all day for his dad to get home from work to play with him. Tom would create elaborate train track arrangements. Dylan would say, “every piece of track”. So Tom would oblige and use every single piece of track.

When Joshua came along our life was different. Tom was back in school, but the deep abiding love for his second born was the same. As a newborn Joshua was colicky, so Tom held him all night until he fell asleep. I’d find baby Joshua snug between his father’s legs. Like a little nest. I’m not sure how Tom had the energy to do that since he was working full time and in school full time, but he did.

Tom takes fatherhood seriously and loves our boys deeply. Tom has always made everything fun for them. Even picking out candy was a fun adventure. Every summer there were father son camping trips filled with junk food and campfires. He has enjoyed taking our boys on adventures and showing them how to explore, and learn, and just be themselves.

Our boys aren’t little anymore but the foundation of love has been built upon over the years with layer upon layer of precious memories. Some difficult memories too. All the good and bad have come together, being used by God in a beautiful plan to shape our sons. Tom helped lay that foundation as their dad.

Thank you Tom for:

Loving our boys.

Loving me.

Loving Jesus.

Sacrificing for us.

Working jobs you hated to provide for our family.

Fixing all the broken things in our house.

Repairing all the cars.

Holding croupy babies in steamy bathrooms.

Taking the boys everywhere and showing them all the cool things.

Showing the boys what it means to be a Godly man.

Discipling our boys and teaching them the difference between right and wrong.

Thank you for the joy, fun, and perspective you give the boys.

We love you Tom! You’re the best dad.

The father of a righteous son will rejoice greatly, and one who fathers a wise son will delight in him. Proverbs 23:24,HCSB

Happy Father’s Day to all the dads. God bless you abundantly!

Love you all,

Meghan

Faith, Family, Parenting, Uncategorized

They Call Me Mom

May 8, 2020 meghanewhite

As a little girl, I dreamed of being a mom. I wanted at least six children. I came from a family of five kids, so six seemed like a good number. I know. Crazy, right? Several years later, and after several years of marriage, I had two sons. Two beautiful boys. God chose me to be Dylan and Joshua’s mom. There aren’t enough words for me to express my love for my children.

The mug in the picture was a birthday gift from my boys last year. They gave me a bunch of very thoughtful things in that gift, but I love this coffee mug. I love big mugs since I drink a lot of coffee and I love that it says “Mom”. A title I dreamed of having for so many years. God made my dream come true.

I remember when I was finally alone with newborn Dylan. My husband had gone back to work and it was me and this tiny human. What was I going to do with him? How was I going take care of a baby all day, every day? I was overwhelmed.

Being a brand new mom with a brand new baby is like being dropped in the middle of the ocean with no land in sight.

In the beginning I flailed in that deep water. My baby wouldn’t nurse. My baby wouldn’t sleep. I experienced my first “Mom guilt”. Great, I can’t even feed my baby. I loved my new baby dearly, but my dream didn’t look as I imagined. Lord help.

Slowly things got better. Dylan began to eat and sleep. I found a rythm as a mom. My confidence built. My prayers grew daily. My “mom” instincts kicked in. And in a short amount of time I felt like an actual mom.

Mom’s do crazy things for our kids because of our crazy love for them.

Mom’s sleep on the floor of our baby’s room right next to the crib, when our baby has the croup.

Mom’s stay up all hours of the night with a newborn, feeding and holding them.

Mom’s change diaper, after diaper, after diaper.

Mom’s haul everything but the kitchen sink in those diaper bags.

Mom’s volunteer at the school, at the church, for the team, or at whatever our kid’s are participating in, just to be close to them.

Mom’s make meal, after meal, after meal.

Mom’s wipe down high chairs countless times.

Mom’s empty potty seats, and watch the potty video over, and over again.

Mom’s wipe noses, and rear ends, and anything else in between.

Mom’s drive our kids to practice, play dates, parties, and school.

Mom’s hold our children tight when they are afraid.

Mom’s kiss the boo-boo and apply the band aid.

Mom’s cheer our kids on when they think they can’t do it.

Mom’s cry when our kid’s cry.

Mom’s laugh when our kid’s share a knock-knock joke, or two, or three.

Mom’s call the advice nurse a few dozen times.

Mom’s make the birthday cake, and decorate it with our kid’s favorite character.

Mom’s pray, and pray, and pray for our children.

There is nothing quite like a mother’s love. God made mom’s special.

I have made many mistakes with my boys. I have lost my temper and yelled at them more times than I can count. I have said “I’m sorry” many times. My boys have said “I’m sorry” many times. As a mom, I’ve learned what real unconditional love really means. I understand the love God has for me in a whole new way.

Being a mom has brought me to my knees, asking for God’s help, wisdom, and mercy. I cannot be the mom God called me to be without Him. I can’t do it in my own strength. I wasn’t supposed to.

This photo booth picture was taken about twelve years ago. It was right after a camping trip. A kind of exhausting camping trip. Joshua was three and was a handful. He spent a lot of time in his car seat in “time out”. Not a dreamy camping trip with a naughty toddler, but still fun. It was nice to stop in a local arcade at the Oregon Coast and just have some fun. Laughter is such a great release from stress. I love that you can only see Joshua’s eyes and nose.

Those amazing boys call me “Mom”. It’s an honor and a privilige to spend time with two funny, brilliant humans. And yes, we laugh a lot. You’ve got to laugh as often as possible, especially when you’re a mom.

Thank you Dylan and Joshua for the joy I get in being your mom. I love you this much (picture my arms spread out) and more. My love for you is bigger than the earth, moon, and stars. God’s love for you is the biggest, beyond measure.

Happy Mother’s Day to every mom. You have a unique calling. May God bless you abundantly.

He tends his flock like a shepherd:
He gathers the lambs in his arms
and carries them close to his heart;
he gently leads those that have young.

Isaiah 40:11, NIV

Love you all,

Meghan